Having read Doe Deere’s post on confession, I thought I’d make my own blog post on the subject!
There are some things you guys don’t know about me, so I’ll go ahead and share them. 
- I was bullied in school. Not horrifically, but enough to make me not want to spend another moment in the place! I was nicknamed Michael Jackson because I have a pointy nose. :p I used to sleep on my face to try and flatten it. Not only did it not work, but it also made it hard to breathe!
- I used to self harm; I have scars on my left arm and on my left leg. You may not see them in most of my modeling pictures, because the majority of photographers choose to edit them out. That’s their choice, however. I am happy for them to be left in my pictures, though. They are a part of me, and always will be. My “Count Your Blessings” tattoo on the inner side of my left arm was originally going to be a cover up tattoo. But I decided not to cover my scars to appease others.
- I have four tattoos; one for each year of my life since I was eighteen. I’ll stop when I have a full leg sleeve and half arm sleeve. I also only have tattoos on the left side of my arm – it was a coincidence at first, but now I am continuing the trend, because I haven’t even got self harm scars on the right side of my body. I guess the right side of my body represents the good in me, and the left represents the growing I’ve done, as well as negative impacts on my life.
- I lost my best friend and mother to suicide. I don’t want to lose anyone else to suicide. It’s so hard to deal with. I dream about my mum and best friend all the time, and think of them daily. It’s so horrible for me to think about the fact that they won’t be there to experience life with me in future. I also hate to think that they died alone with nobody to hold them. I have dreams that they are still alive. All of the dreams involve them being lost somewhere, or something regarding them being stuck – I have to find a way to free them, or find them. I always find them at the end of the dream and subsequently wake up feeling that their presence is with me (though I don’t believe in a god or the supernatural). It gives me a warmth in my heart, with a longing feeling as well.
- The reason I started modeling is not because I thought I was hot or wanted to feel better about myself, but because I thought it’d help me with future ventures; I am thinking of starting my own clothing line. Being a model means that I’ll be able to model my own clothing and have the benefit of having professional photographers help me out. I’ve also got to know a few models, who’ll probably help me out with showing off the line, too. But that’s not in the near future, so we shall see!
